The Last Word

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

The Last Word

It's the rant I've been slowly building up to over the past few weeks, but, thankfully, I can put down my sword. I have nothing else to say about the war on Christmas because says it all. An excerpt:
At what point did a basic understanding of the separation of church and state become a fucking war on religion? And how did we get to the point where you can call an organization set up to defend our civil liberties “Terrorists” on national television and no one fires your ass? Enough. Fuck all of you lying little shitheads who wish the world was out to get you so you could play the poor oppressed victims. Wake up assholes — you’re the cowboys, not the fucking Indians.
Let’s back up even fucking further, shall we? Can anyone tell me how old Christmas is? Anyone? Two thousand years, give or take, right? Gee, who’s been reading their No Child Left Behind History Textbooks? Try fucking four thousand years. Huh. Twice as fucking long as your little baby king has been around. How could that possibly be, unless. . . waitaminute. . .

Christmas isn’t fucking Christian. Ok, now we’re talking.

That’s right, that Yuletide cheer you’re spreading? Those “Christmas” traditions? They’re not just like Pagan rituals, they fucking are Pagan rituals. Yule? It’s the holiday celebrating the rebirth of the Sun god Mithra in . . . guess when? Go on – guess. Late December. What a weird coincidence. Practically the whole thing is ripped off from the fucking Druids. Twelve days? Check. Exchanging gifts? Check. Mistletoe? Check. And you’d better fucking believe that those decorated trees that [John] Gibson and Co. are so bent out of shape over are as Pagan as the Rune and Crystal Shack at Pentagramfest 2005. You might as well be building miniature fucking Stonehenges in your den.
Christians just stole a bunch of traditions from other cultures, slapped them together, stuck a fucking tinfoil star on top and called it the Most Important Holiday of the Year. Modern American Christmas makes Michael Jackson look positively organic.
Oddly enough if Christmas wasn't considered a Christian holiday and wasn't so overly commericialized I just might join in and celebrate it-- but the sham factor is just too big for me to ignore. The whole holiday is nothing more than a Pagan festival dressed up in Jesus drag.

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